exercise, tummy aches, and mindlessly eating.

well first off, let me just say that it STARTED out as a GREAT day! I woke up had my oatmeal and then off to the gym I went. I did 15 minutes on the stairs machine and ran for 30 minutes on incline of 5. and intreval runs from 5.5-7mph.  Then I got home had lunch adn relaxed for a bit.

Then it happened...


Next thing you know I am eating all of my leftovers from last nights my healthy fried rice.. and then nut butters with some alphabet cookies.. it was well not a lot of food, but nonethless, it wasnt something I can look back and say "oh thats fine!" ..No it's not. I was just so sad. See I had gone on a walk with my sister and her husband to trader joes and i was really excited because I was about to go for another 1.20 hour walk which meant more excercise and who can say no to that? I can't! So you know, we are walking there and my sister and her husband totally made me feel invisible. They were just arguing while on our walk and i was getting really annoyed. I am walking to release all the happy hormones we get from a good workout and here they were arguing! ughhh. then they got all happy and totally walked fast and in front of me and next thing you know they are like a block away ahead from me. ARE YOU KIDDING ME!? It is dark out anf they just idont know, forgot i was there!? It was my idea to go and it was only supposed to be me and my sister then he came along... ughhh. so anyway I was so mad, I just turned back home and didnt tell them. All I thought was "whatever, im sure they wont even know i am gone"..so sad and angry I walked back home. I was so upset I ate too soon too fast and mindlessly. I knew it was wrong, but thats kind of how i cope. (it needs to change), but now I am feeling better. I lied to my sister and told her my stomach hurter and thats why i had turned back, but it did hurt like hell..I am hoping my results from the doctor tell me whats wrong with my stomach...anyhow...

I am fine now. I am still a little uneasy that i ate so mindlessly and out of anger/sadness, but it is okay now. I will not sabotage all my efforts. I am just going to go on with my day and not starve tomorrow just because i didnt do well today because i am NOT on a diet! PLUS, I exercised at least! so it is way better than not having worked out and having had eaten like i did today.


anyhow, that's my rant for today. just had to let it out. I hate being a third wheeler.